There are many different ways I could start this post.
A) I love you.
B) I miss you.
C) Are we drifting apart?
D) Everything is alright.
E) I wonder what you are doing right now.
F) I hope everything is going well for you.
G) What exactly is reassurance?
H) What is going on in your life right now?
I) Am I unable to help you in any way?
J) When are we going to reconnect?
I prefer the last one. When are we going to reconnect? That's a very interesting question.
A) When we are both in a better place.
B) When I am better able to help you.
C) When you are able to find time for me.
D) When you want to talk to me.
E) When you think about me, positively, and want to reach out.
F) When I'll be doing better, financially.
G) When the universe brings us together.
H) When we stop thinking about it.
I) When the world gets crazy enough and you need or want my help.
J) When you feel like it would be a good thing for you to reach out.
I'd like to apologize right now, but I'm doing well. I'm being a good friend to you, and I'm doing my best. I love myself, and the way I am. I'm a beautiful person, with a beautiful mind. And I see you the same way. I hope we can see each other that way someday. That would be nice! I'm taking good care of myself. And I'm happy on my unusual path. I trust that we're going to reconnect. When you want to. And there's no reason for why you wouldn't want to be my friend, considering that I'm the best friend anyone can have! :-) I hope that you love yourself. Self-love is very important. You have to love yourself as much as you love your family, and your friends. Take good care of yourself, dear friend - and rest well!
What paths am I interested in?
A) Unusual paths! Definitely.
B) Extreme paths. I'm a very very very competitive person. Makes sense why I want to be the best friend.
C) New paths. I don't like repeating the paths others took before me. That's a good reason to study history, to avoid it!
D) Lonely paths. Isolating myself from others brings out my infinite devotion and commitment! The more time I spend alone, the weirder I become. I love that! I'm becoming unique, and that's a good thing.
E) Helpful paths. If I can help someone, I'd like that. I like being a generous person, a kind one, a caring one.
F) Normal paths. I'd like to understand normal paths better. I guess there is a sense of comfort, doing "normal" things. Maybe also a sense of belonging. Although I've never felt like I belonged anywhere. Strange to call myself a "human".
G) Shortcuts! Shortcuts are fun! I love shortcuts. Everybody loves shortcuts.
H) Good paths. Morality is everyone's compass in life. What is good, what is bad. Pleasant things tend to be good. Being a little bit hedonistic is totally fine - just don't get too short sighted. Balance is the solution to everything.
I) Self-improvement! Actually, I view it as the core purpose in my life, or any life at all. Self-improvement is a very very very obscure term, culturally speaking. When you pursue your hobbies, you're improving yourself. When you do something you enjoy, you are improving the moment. When you eat food, you are improving your future, right? When you reflect on your past, you are improving your past too. You turn bad experiences into useful lessons. When you flee America and come to your best friend in Switzerland... lol
J) Anchor-paths. I like to set an anchor for myself, like a stepping stone. Then I explore different paths from there, like a lightning. And when I'm done, I come back to my anchor. Then I repeat the lightning process. Maybe I find new interesting anchors during my exploration. Then I will add them to my collection.
K) Balanced paths. Too much novelty leads to chaos. Too much repetition leads to stagnation. Our universe is a good example!
What can I do right now... what can WE do right now to make life better? (Improving the present, past & possibilities)
A) eat something. maybe that would help! you can try to think about your past portion sizes and food choices. how did you make these decisions? do you think your nutrition is good? how was in the past? how can i get better?
B) consider a problem. i know you felt like an outsider in the past. a "weird" person, maybe. well, i like you the way you are. but, also, nobody is just "one thing". tomorrow you will be somebody else. in a month you will be somebody else. in a year you will be somebody else. hence the power of commitment. remember to commit to something that you value. like your family, or your friends... or even yourself! in the past you didn't connect well. in the present, you are struggling socially, financially and emotionally. in the future... the possibilities... you're afraid, i guess. it's a normal thing. how can you improve all these 3 aspects? you were always a beautiful person, unique. beautiful people struggle in this world. this world is a "world of average". you should enter a different world. this world contains many worlds. every world contains infinitely many other worlds. right now - maybe your struggles in America represent a new chapter in your life. Maybe it's time for something new. Every struggle has paths towards something better. And the future - you are worried. Use this worry for something good. What are your options? Expand your mind! Consider 100 different options. Of course it's going to be difficult, but I am here, and I can help with that. Consider the NOW - the moment, your situation. What is your mind like right now? What is your body like right now? What is your environment like right now? Immediate environment, local environment, country environment, global environment... and how can you affect all of these things? A lot of people worry about country-level or global things, while neglecting their own minds and bodies. Is that a smart thing to do? What do you think? You are my friend. Hugs!
C) Consider your hobbies. What hobbies did you have in the past? In the present? What hobbies could you have in the future? I used to love video games. I spend 90% of my free time on Minecraft. Yes, I was addicted. I've been an addict my whole life. But addicts aren't very different from normal people. Are they? lol. Anyway, I'm an extreme person. In the present, I love to write. I love being creative. I love helping others. I love thinking about positive possible possibilities! In the future, one of my hobbies might earn me money. Maybe earning money could be my hobby. Investing? Investing could be a hobby for me. Doing youtube stuff could be a hobby. It's very useful to be well-known nowadays. What about you?
D) Grounding. It helped me when I was anxious. It can help you when you're planning something. It helps me right now and lets me write this post.
E) Being creative! I was creative... when I was suffering. Suffering forced me to be creative. I should suffer more... Right now I am creative by writing. That's a good thing. I love writing. Although, words are not enough to capture how something truly is. Only experience can. In the future, possibilities - I could be creative about how to add a lot of tiny positive processes into my life.
F) Pain. In the past I've felt a lot of pain. I was always stressed. I couldn't ever relax. I had to escape life into the digital craps, to forget everything. Shame - one of my biggest pains. I've been ashamed for every single bit of my life. Being extremely open and vulnerable is my way of dealing with it. In the future, there will be more pain. But it will be different. Pain is never the same. You feel pain until you learn. Then the pain changes. And you do too.
G) Learning. In the past, I didn't like to "learn". I always loved the process of isolating things, abstraction. Things have to be connected first, in order to isolate them. Life is infinitely connected, but fortunately it is also infinitely disconnected. Yes, I'm a smart guy :)) And you can be too! Smart, I mean - not a guy. Although, you can be a guy if you want to. We can still be friends. In the future, everything has to be learned. Everything. Learn to explore. Learn to estimate. Learn to guess in foresight. Learn to evaluate in hindsight. Learn to perceive in the present. To learn is to prepare. I hope you can prepare a good future for yourself.
H) Writing. I could turn my writing into a book - if I cared enough. I can do it quite easily, but not easy enough! I can read something. Reading helps your writing. Is that a bad guess? In the past, I didn't care to write much. Nobody had showed me how much fun it could be. So now I can show others how much fun it can be. When you're ahead, you should try to help others get ahead.
I) Love. I've never really felt loved. Right now I feel loved. By myself. In the future, maybe you will love me! Somehow. In your own way.